William

Just the other day, the Boss was rummaging through his desk drawers, looking for a condom as it happens (just don't ask!)

And lo and behold he unearthed instead an old, unlabelled computer disk.  It was a bit dusty - indeed, it was quite stained (don't ask, again!) - but when he put it into the disk drive a broad smile creased his face...

At long last he'd found the missing set of William!

If you're a long-standing HMBoys member - or if you've valiantly managed to scroll all the way through to "W" in our alphabetical index of well over 600 model sets - you'll remember William.

"Midwest... down-to-earth... beef" was how we described him on his first photoset and he proved to be one of the most popular models we had.

Subsequently we brought you a set of William and his best friend Spencer having a water fight in William's beloved garden and another featuring him and his punky friend Spike (so named for his outrageous hair).

But for years we've been looking everywhere for William's second solo set, until the Boss found it in the desk drawer.

You'd think he would have been happy about that, wouldn't you?

But far from it...  Now he's started talking about having all the staff DNA-tested to see who matches those mysterious stains on the disk.

Personally, it think that's a waste of time.

But the boss insists that, starting next Monday, we'll each be called into his office to give not only cheek swabs - which I'm told is the proper way to do it - but also ("just for backup!") swabs from more intimate bodily areas and even individual sperm samples...    

And, tightwad with money as ever, the Boss, with a wicked gleam in his eye, says he won't be hiring a nurse.

Instead, he'll be carrying out the procedures entirely on his own...