Greg

I've worked in advertising for a long time now…

That's how I was planning to start this story.

But then I crossed it out.

After all, as soon as you read it you'd be thinking oh, here's another piece of hogwash about some guy who gets hot boys to strip off for him on advertising photoshoots and then has the most amazing sex with them….

Well, funnily enough, I could write that story - but it wouldn't be about me.

I've got plenty of colleagues who do nothing but underwear ads - by choice, of course!

And the stories they can tell about what models will do to get a contract…

Well, I seem to recall you read something like that right here just a week ago, so I won't bother repeating it for you now.

But though I am in advertising, that's really got nothing much to do with the story, because the products I specialise in promoting are (wait for it!) paints, varnishes and hardware goods in general.

And, as you can imagine, there's not a lot of scope there for any boy-fun…

But I'm telling you this because a few summers ago I was in England where I happened to see an ad on TV.

It was for a can of varnish - one of the hardest things to get people excited about.

But this time the copy-writer had come up with a real gem of a slogan - Sam's Varnish (or whatever its name was) - it does what it says on the can.

Now believe me, my friends, that's clever.

Memorable.

And a brilliant tag line for something as unexciting as varnish.

And the only reason that I mention it now is because it's a line that always comes to mind when I think of Greg.

Greg - let's not mince our words here - is a small-time hustler in the city where I live.

Not an especially good one.

Not an especially bad one.

Just an average hustler.

And if you were interested in taking him on a date - at, of course, your own expense! - then there's no better way to find out about him than to just look at his picture.

Greg, after all, is living proof that It does what it says on the can applies just as much to people too.

Take a look…

What do you see?

Cool, calm, uninterested - a touch of arrogance, maybe?

A boy who knows he's got you exactly where he wants you - at least while that bulge in your pants remains unattended to.

He'll do some of what you ask him.

He'll let you take pictures (though, of course, his hourly rate goes up for that).

He'll smile, if you ask him to, although you'd never get him to admit that he might actually get any pleasure out of his work.

But most of the time - even when he does smile - he's trying to keep up that impression of a boy who'd really rather not be here, thanks very much, but who knows that with a minimum of effort he can make himself a few bucks.

Let's be fair.

Let's give Greg his due.

He's not into ripping you off.

But it's a definite case of look - but don't touch.

If all you want to do is admire that body from a distance and store up a few mental images to fuel your fantasies once he's left, then Greg's your boy.

On that basis, he'll do whatever you ask.

Pose…
 
Strip…

Tease…

And finally let you look as close up as you want - but no touching, man! - from all sides.

But don't be fooled.

Because even the smile you get after you've handed over the cash is just about as empty as a used-up can of that varnish.